Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Dilemmas

Dilemma #1

I step out of the Gas Hog and start to walk around to the passenger side to get Little One out when I am approached by a woman wearing a black heavy coat with the hood up and black sweat pants. "Excuse me, but could you come over here to my car and help me get my grandson out of his car seat? I can't seem to get the latch undone". What do I do?

I don't know this person. If I go over to her car which happens to be halfway across the parking lot to help her get her grandson out (which will require two hands), that means I have either leave Little One in my car alone while I go to her car or I have to get Little One out (32 degrees outside and raining) and let this stranger hold her while I get the grandson out. Again, I don't know this person from Adam. What if there is no grandson in the car? What if she is in cahoots with someone else and just wants to steal my car? What if she just wants to steal my purse? or worse what if she What if she thinks I'm going to come help her and knows she'll have to hold my baby and takes her? Or is trying to get me away from the car so they can take the car AND the baby?

OR

What if she's just a nice lady that can't get the latch undone on her grandson's car seat?

What did I do? Well you'll just have to wait for that.....What would YOU do?


Dilemma #2

Big One has a birthday coming up in a couple weeks, February 7th to be exact. She will be 7 years old. SEVEN.....WOW! Wasn't she just born last week? Didn't we just have her 3rd birthday party yesterday? So I'm talking with Big One about what she wants to do for her birthday this year. Last year she did Sweet & Sassy (my yahoo friends will remember my plight, MISSING my little girls birthday party while I was living in the hospital waiting for Little One to arrive, or not arrive just yet actually....worst time of my life. It still kills me that I missed such an important day for her. My own personal hell, living in the hospital AND missing an important time for her), the year before she did Monkey Joe's, the year before Build A Bear and so on and so forth. How sad is it that we are already running out of birthday places and she's only 7?? You see anything outdoors is out of the question because well, she was born the beginning of February and that happens to be the coldest month of the year here in North Carolina and the weather is ALWAYS shitty on her birthday. It hasn't failed yet. Well, if you've ever had a little girl or been a little girl you know that you can't, you just CAN'T have the same 'kind' of birthday party that your friend is having.....which means no skating, ice or roller this year and no spa (ha!) and no bowling, plus the fact the we are no longer "babies" and are way to sophisticated for babyish themes or princesses and such. It actually leaves us next to no ideas. I can't deal with a slumber party, I can't even get Little One to sleep through the night, she's always sick and truth be told I'm not sure my nerves can take that many 6 and 7 year old girls at one time....just being honest. So Big One is trying to decide and can't come up with anything. Help.

Help us, help me.....HELP!

Again I ask, what would you do?


Dilemma #3

We decided to finish the bonus room as a nursery when I found out I was pregnant in 2007. I knew exactly what I wanted, boy or girl and I had the perfect ideas in my head. It would be the perfect shade of light aqua blue with white crown molding, white dressers (3 of them) set into the wall to create more floor space and a white tree with tan leaves hand painted by me into the corner and up onto the ceiling of one side of the room. Perfect. I even ordered the bedding cause it didn't matter boy or girl, that was the room. Over the next few months we got the insulation done and the framing and modifications finished. The electrical was nearly finished and the sheet rock was delivered and ready to be hung but we had to wait for the HVAC guys to come and move some duct work around....and then I lost the baby.......

By far the worst day of my life. I'm not sure I'll ever live to see a harder day than that. I hope and pray that I don't. BUT that's another post, this post is about my dilemma. On with the story.......about 4 months later I found out I was pregnant AGAIN. This time not on purpose and this time I WAS NOT happy about it. I couldn't force myself to get happy. It was awful. I never even told anyone I was pregnant until I was 5 months along. So this whole time I was in denial. Never even set foot in the 'nursery' that was still unfinished. Never gave it another thought. Did not begin to make plans or prepare for this baby, because I couldn't. I couldn't do it. I was so afraid of losing another baby that I couldn't do it. So long story short early in January last year I started bleeding.....yup.....I knew it right? I was right not to plan.....so I thought. I ended up on bedrest with a placenta previa. So now I'm not only not wanting to be pregnant or even admitting that this is happening, but the baby is due in April and I am expected to lay in a bed for the next 4 months....Oh dear God.....

As you can imagine this gave me a lot of time to think and I decided it was time to finish the nursery (well the Husband actually decided that he was going to do it regardless and if I wanted it to be done my way I'd better start admitting this WAS happening). SO, he had done all the work he could do without help and expertise so we decided to hire someone to do the rest. We hired a guy that works with me and does remodels on the side. I've known him for years and years and he's done lots of work for lots of people I know. He knew we were on a tight budget and now with me out of work it had to be done quickly and on a budget because we were paying him by the hour and didn't have a lot to spend on this project. Well, long story short the little bit of work that needed done by him (hang sheet rock, mud sheet rock, trim work and a few little things) should take no more than two weeks maximum. It took almost until the baby was born and he brought a helper to boot......ridiculous. I thought surely he didn't expect I'd be paying for both when it was a one man job and very small at that!! He did, he billed me for so many hours and for two people at that. I was out of work and was earning about $175/week on disability. Well, after I got that bill, literally the next day I started bleeding again and this time they admitted me and wouldn't let me leave until the baby was born (she was born a month later at 36 weeks due to a big bleed emergency csection.....she was due end of April and was born March 1st at 4lbs. 13 oz. 17 1/2 in). ANYWAY (focus Said So, focus!) this asshat was bugging the shit out of me the whole time wanting his money. I told him that we were going to have to talk about this, he drug it out on purpose to make more money and I didn't think what he was asking was fair for the small amount of work that was done. Plus I've known this person and it baffled me that he would do this to me.....

We ended up getting two other contractors to give us quotes on what it SHOULD have cost (which was less than HALF of what he was charging me) thinking that we would show him those and asking WTF? maybe negotiate a little seeing how we had NO extra money and a new baby in the NICU.....plus keep in mind this person was a 'friend'. All this was going to make it quite uncomfortable for me to back to work since I saw him every day there. The deadline on doing something.....pay him or confront him was coming up.....

What would YOU have done? What did I do? You'll have to wait and see......

Dilemma #4

Last one.....pinky swear

I'm thinking of starting a new Wednesday thing......Would You Rather Wednesday.......

See Big One got this awesome game for Christmas called (appropriately) Would You Rather? and we have had the most fun with it! Makes me want to to play it with all the blogworld!

Example......Would you rather be able to bring about world peace or cure all hunger and disease? or Would you rather be able to fly or read people's minds? or Would you rather age only from the neck up or age only from the neck down?

Anyway, it's in the planning stage and I want to know what you think....


5 comments:

Amy Amy Bo Bamey said...

Dilemma 1
That is such a hard one, you hear of those scams all the time. I am not sure what I would have done. Why would she leave her car if it was across the parking lot with her grandson in it. Curious to see what you did.

Dilemma 2
What about a movie outing with some of her closest friends. I did that with my daughter when she turned 8. We did a lunch and movie and then went back to the house and opened gifts.

Dilemma 3
I would sit the "friend" down show him the other quotes and see if he would be willing to come down in price. Just be truthful and let him know funds are tight and that bill you were not expecting to be that high.

Dilemma 4
Sounds like fun, I would play!

Jana, Mom to Mr. Q and Miss E + 7 said...

Dilemma 1
I would have said I have my hands full. But I will see if someone in the store can help her. I would not have left my child alone, or let a stranger hold him / her. I also would not have left them in my car unattended.

Dilemma 2
Maybe a fashion show? Dress them all up ? Or a mask party. Heck I don't know.

Dilemma 3
Work and awkwardness be damned, Buck works to hard for our money for us to pad someone elses pockets. It would be war......

Delimma 4
I like the Would you rather thing LOL You must come up with some Mommy torture questions too. Like Would you rather breast feed for 9 months without being able to have any dairy at all, or Pluck your eyes out with tweezers LOL

( Can you tell I am done done done ? )

Jennifer said...

Dilemma 1 - Sure just let me take the baby in and I'll be right back to help. If she is for real, she'll understand, not for real, she'll leave.

Dilemma 2 - Movie night, tell her she can have 2 - 3 friends and they can have a semi-slumber party where they hang out in their pj's and watch a movie and eat popcorn and pizza and cake. No kids for all night, and completely different from what other friends are doing and not as expensive because you limit the kids and have it at home.

Dilemma 3 - Tell him to stick it.

Dilemma 4 - Sounds cool.

The Mom said...

Ooh Amy has what I was thinking...Movies with a few close friends, ice cream cake, gifts...My youngest is feb 3rd and we're praying for good weather...oh and my bday is the 6th! Go Aquarians!

Kelly said...

#1-I would find out where her car is located and either find someone from the store to assist y'all or drive my car over to assist.

#2-no idea....my daughter's bday is in Dec..but she just turned 2 so I haven't had to do this...YET!

#3-Stick to your guns DO NOT let said "friend" hold you hostage!!

 
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