Friday Fragments

I was going to go a different direction today but I started a post and lost that 'direction' I was headed in so.....since I can't get my shit together today...Friday Fragments it is. How appropriate considering my mind frame today. Mine are more like Friday Brain Farts than fragments though....

- I'm trying to get it together and summon up the courage to do my taxes. I know we are getting a big refund what with the outrageous medical bills and the storage fees alone for the extra kid we added this year should get us a big chunk. I hate taxes though. Suck it up Alison.

- Television sucked this week. The only saving grace was RHOC...it never disappoints. I know I've been all "I hate Grey's Anatomy anymore" but is anyone else looking forward to the Grey's Anatomy/Private Practice Crossover Event (sounds so urgent...like I just can't miss it, but will probably be a tremendous buzz kill)

- Little One was diagnosed with Asthma yesterday. Yet another ailment to add to the arsenal.

- I'm feeling a little bad about Big One not having a birthday party. What to do what to do....

- My desk looks like the file cabinet next to it went into labor and blew paper up one end and down the other

- Got my end of year statement when I picked up the minis from Storage yesterday.....I spent almost $12k for storage this year. Incredible.

- If Big One or Little One ever decides after they already have 6 children and are living in MY tiny 3 bedroom home in East Egypt with no spouse or job, that they think it might be a good idea to implant 8 or 10 more embryos and have a few more grit snatchers for ME to take care of then they should just know that apparently their Mommy is not THAT awesome. I'm just sayin...

What, WHAT exactly about that whole scenario looked like a good idea? And just how do you pay to have fertility treatments such as those when you are unemployed and have no husband, but the better question is WHY?

- An old client I photographed several times and who failed to pay me for her Christmas Cards this year (and knows it) emailed me and wanted to know if I could email her one of the photos I took so she could print some copies for her house........oh yes she did

- I have a new FaceCrack Chronicles coming up.....don't let me forget, cause I will. I almost forgot to post what I did in the case of the lady asking me to get her kid out of the car and stuff.....Monday

- I need to know more about waxing......waxing in the netherlands.....you know....WAXING....suggestions, tips, opinions? Let's have a discussion shall we?

Thousand Words Thursday

Damn, is it Thursday again already....I've got to put some new pictures on this computer!

I've used another photo in this 'tea party' group before, but I loved them all so much.

Big One having a tea party with her peeps

For more Thousand Words Thursday see my homegirl Jen at Cheaper than Therapy!

Let the games begin

Okay folks.....here we go! The first ever Would You Rather Wednesday! I will post three scenario's with two answers. Choose to answer only one or answer all three, but answer always honestly. Tell me your answer and then tell me why you answered that way.

I expect everyone who visits this blog to participate fully. I can't wait to read your answers!!

Have fun and most importantly, be honest. I'll start simple this week....

Today's Would You Rather Questions are:

1. In the Ethics/Intelligence department Would you rather...

Choose to see your future (without being able to change it)

-OR-

Know everyone else's future and not be able to tell them?

I'm going easy this time.....My answers are included in tomorrow's post

2. In the Pain/Fear/Discomfort department Would you rather....

Bite the curb and get kicked in the back of the head

-OR-

Get a paper cut on your eyeball?

(that one made my skin crawl)

3. finally in the Random department Would you rather....

Have to kill Winnie the Pooh

-OR-

Bambi?

I'm 100 today!

here we go......it's not that interesting to don't get too excited! 100 things about me!

1. I have one older brother, no sisters


2. My parents are still happi.... well, they are still married, let's just leave it at that.


3. I work for our family business that has been in business since 1883.


4. I went to 2 universities and have a degree from neither (I'm one semester short...slack ass)


5. I went to photography school and have the master photographer certification to prove it. PPA and PPNC


6. I have been with my husband for 13 years, married for almost 9


7. Little One was kind of an accident in case you ever wondered why my minis are so far apart....another story entirely


8. Between me (Feb), the Husband (Mar), Big One (Feb) and Little One (Mar), all of our birthdays are in February and March.


9. I sleep on the right side of the bed (if you are laying on it looking at the ceiling)


10. I cannot sleep with the tv on, I need quiet.


11. I have had surgery on my jaw


12. I have had two knee surgeries, one meniscal repair and one meniscal transplant


13. I think I've mentioned this before but my transplant is from a cadaver. I see dead people...I can never resist that but obviously that lovely donor had better knees than me. If you aren't an organ donor, you should be, I am.


14. Both minis are c-section babies, both emergency c-section babies. (that makes 5 surgeries if you are keeping up......they'll be a quiz later)


15. The only bone I've ever broken was my little toe and DAMN did that hurt


16. I've had stitches in my chin twice


17. My hair is obnoxiously long right now and is getting ready to be cut and colored Saturday (yippie!!)


18. My ears are pierced three times on one side and two times on the other (long story) but I only wear earrings in the first holes


19. I wash my hair every other day and wear my hair up every other day (you guessed that right?)


20. My natural hair color is dark brown and my eyes are olive green



21. I love to get pedicures but I never get them, I do it myself. I don't have time or money to get them anywhere else, so I'm pretty good at it!



22. I never get manicures. I never paint my nails, they are au naturale but they are naturally long and thick as concrete like fake ones (how appropriate that I would get good nails when I could care less about them)



23. I hate my car grocery getter gas hog school bus Toyota SUCKuoia



24. I wear Merle Norman makeup, I have since I was 15 and no matter what else I ever try, I always go right back. I love it. The Ultra powder foundation is da bomb. I don't wear liquid foundation ever, don't need it with that stuff. It's awesome. Love love love.



25. I love shoes, I have a shit ton of shoes. Entirely too many pairs but I wear either my brown suede or black suede Dansko clogs EVERY day to work. Why do I need all those shoes?



26. I dress my minis better than I dress myself



27. I am fearful that I will not have a job soon and the Husband is already on short time with this economy. It's making me bananas



28. I get allergy shots once a week



29. Accounting is my money making job but photography is my great love and passion (part time unfortunately)



30. I love football



31. I love my Chamilia bracelet, it's my favorite piece of jewelry, every bead has it's own special meaning to me and it's so damn cool I get compliments on it EVERY time I wear it which is all the time



32. My minis both have names that make doctors office appointment makers automatically assume they are boys and it makes me insane......they aren't THAT boyish really. I wouldn't have considered either a boy name to be truthful



33. Black and white photos are my favorite. Something about seeing a person's expression and REALLY seeing something of them instead of what color their shirt is or something. Nature shots are fine in color though.



34. I am a sheet snob. My sheets are more expensive than I care to admit.....Sferra..it's bad



35. My favorite candle scent is Archipeligo Botanicals Pineapple Ginger....it is yummy and makes my house smell fantastic



36. I'm weird about the cleanliness of bathrooms



37. I am allergic to seafood but I can't understand why you'd want to eat something that smells so bad anyway



38. My biggest meal of the day is lunch, sometimes I forget supper (for me, for me, I feed the minis.....relax)



39. My girls both have the same nose and mouth....I love those little mouths. They have the best lips, both of them



40. I love grape koolaid



41. I drink Dr. Pepper all the time. Diet Dr. Pepper mostly but I'll take regular if you don't have diet



42. I used to love to waterski but I can't now because of the transplant, if I mess that up it's total knee for me



43. I used to love to do a lot of things I can't now come to think of it, rock climbing etc.



44. I love cheez doodles



45. I love cupcakes. Love love cupcakes



46. I devour books......on my iPod



47. I hate American Idol



48. I love doublemint gum



49. My favorite food is Mexican

50. I like wine (a lot)

51. I smoke sometimes (don't judge me)

52. I have too many projects I want to start but they all cost money that I don't (and won't it looks like) have

53. I love love love my new kitty. She is almost as cool as my old kitty that passed away a few days after my Little One was born.

54. I cannot stand negativity bad attitudeness.....even though I seem to have a bad attitude a lot of the time

55. I like to plant flowers

56. I love Target

57. I don't like eggs or mushrooms

58. I got married outside at my parents lakehouse right beside the water

59. My first car was a Chevrolet Chevette

60. I used to ride a motorcycle, a Ninja

61. I used to dance/teach dance and I dearly loved it but it's what messed up my knees for life

62. I cannot...CANNOT rollerblade. My body just won't do it

63. I like to watch Lifetime movies

64. I couldn't ever get into the Harry Potter books and/or movies

65. I hate science fiction

66. I hate romance novels

67. But I LOVE the Twilight series....(almost done with the last book...the third book was kind of draggy outy and I was getting bored but it got better. The fourth book is good but I think the whole Jacob's book part was a little long-ish and drug on too, but I'm past that part and it's good again)

68. I feel bad that Big One has to choose party or Wii......I get the lesson learned and the choice making deal and all that but I feel bad she won't get a real party somewhere inside me.

69. My husband doesn't help me enough and he tap dances on my last nerve daily, but I still love him

70. I have always lived in North Carolina

71. I have always wanted to go to Hawaii....some day

72. back to my choices in literature......I love TRUE things....nonfiction if you will. I like memoirs and true crime and stuff like that.

73. I used to love Grey's Anatomy but it's boring me these days. I like Intervention, How I Met Your Mother, Rules of Engagement, Two and a Half Men, the NFL Channel, Entourage, Big Love, Chelsea Lately, Private Practice, So You think you can dance, RH of wherever, Kathy Griffin my life on the d list, and the list goes on and on and on.......the kicker is I don't have time to watch most of them.....but I do make time for football, that is an addiction and I can't help it

74. I met Oprah and had lunch with Whoopie Goldberg when they lived in my town while filming the Color Purple (my BFF's mom worked at the hotel they were staying in and got to know them)

75. My office at home is filled with framed autographed jerseys and footballs and hats and photos.

76. My SUCKouia wears a personalized Carolina Panthers license plate with my favorite panther ever's jersey # and initials. It also wears a Panthers white "whiskers" decal and a Panthers hitch cover. Obsessed much?

77. There is a group of 4 girls including me that have all been best friends since we were THREE years old and we still all talk at least 3 or 4 times a week.......my BBFF is one of those girls and we talk email and text daily

78. I am tired

79. This is hard, I do not have 100 even remotely interesting things to share about myself

80. I love my house but I will NEVER build another house it was murder

81. I have been told time and time again that I am a good decorator, so I guess I'm okay at that, I just do what I like

82. I switch bedding a lot......I used to be that way about shower curtains and stuff when I lived in an apartment. I got bored with them easily. Now it's my bedding, I switch it a lot

83. I have an affinity for old cameras and they also are all over my office at home along with the cameras and equipment I actually use now

84. I used to make bows for little girls hair. I have so many damn bows at my house it's sick

85. I have my own tools and most of the time don't ask my husband to fix things for me, I fix them myself

86. I am NOT a damsel in distress, but I play one on TV

87. I have Panic Disorder but I have it all under control without the aid of pharmaceuticals..... I am amazing that way. I do pop a Xanax from time to time but who doesn't?

88. I am convinced each of my children took with them important parts of my brain when they were birthed. I seem to forget everything and it gets worse with each child.....good thing I fixed that

89. I shut down the factory and turned it into a playground!

90. I wear a lot of black, but not on purpose I don't think

91. I hate getting older

92. I'm not much into politics

93. I am intolerant of ignorance

94. I am almost done!!!

95. I am wondering if anyone actually made it this far

96. I am going to tell you my real name is Alison

97. Are you going to believe me?

98. This blogging thing is fun and I hope that more people will actually start commenting. I can see that people read, but not a lot of people comment and that sucks

99. My little girls are such beauties. I love them so much it hurts

100. Th th th th THAT's all Folks!!

Whew........that was hard..........

Happy 100th post to me!!

technical difficulties

or maybe I just hit enter and posted a post before it was ready to be posted....and then subsequently deleted said post which may or may not have included my real name (GASP!)

don't go searching for it, I'm going to actually post it later, when it's finished that is......for my official 100th post. This is post 98 so, soon.

sorry to have falsely alerted you to a non-post post.....

I'm such a tease

I'll have the biggest Dr. Pepper you have with a side of WOW!

True to form at the Said So house it was a zoo this morning. A zoo with an escaped monkey that subsides on Gerber's Puffs and a very angry and grumpy gorilla that does a lot of grunting and throwing itself on the floor. THIS morning the Zookeeper's helper (aka the Husband) may have lost his job. Instead of the normal routine of him waking the angry and grumpy gorilla while I get ready for work at Mach 8000 so as to be ready before the monkey awakens demanding bottles and puffs, he sleeps in....or rather pretends to sleep in while the flurry of activity goes on around him. Faker.

Seems the Zookeeper's helper has come down with a sinus infection and is nearly on his death bed. You know, quite similar to the one that I just had last week, remember? The one where I SUCKED IT UP and went to the Minute Clinic (best invention EVAH), got some antibiotics and powered through. Rinsing my sinuses (with Neil Med Sinus Rinse....second best invention EVAH...better than the Neti Pot, which was recommended but I have used before and the rinse is the same deal, just not as weird and awkward) twice a day and popping some ibuprofen. He is getting ready for work a few minutes ago after just having awakened after a grueling day of SLEEPING all mother plucking day long whining incessantly about how he feels as though he's been hit by an eighteen wheeler and then drug down the road a bit.......waaa, waaa, waaaa, I say. Shall I call for a WAAAAMMMBULANCE?? SUCK. IT. UP. Put on your big girl panties and DEAL WITH IT!

Anywho after that seriously fantastic morning at the casa, I decided that Mommy needed some Chick fil A in her life. I am in line at the drive thru running majorly late ( I don't care if that's not a word dammit...focus) because Big One's ride was late picking her up and Little One had a blow out just before we get in the car that required a full costume change and mini-bath and I loathe being late. I cannot stand to be late. I AM late all the time, but it bothers me immensely, especially when it isn't my fault. Especially when it is other people who don't care about being late that make me late. So I'm waiting my turn in the drive thru getting more aggravated by the second. I'm all "what are they ordering one of everything" "did they have to go out back and kill the chickens for those chicken minis?" "are you ordering a biscuit for everyone you know?" and the like. I'm spouting all of this aimlessly into the air, talking to Little One through the rear view mirror and she's all "Did I hear someone say Puffs?" paying me no attention. I'm nice and ill by the time it's my turn at the speaker but I am cordial and order my food and hope to quickly get back on my way, grumbling the whole time. I wait some more behind the folks that ordered one of everything and the one that ordered biscuits for everyone she knew and FINALLY it's my turn. The girl at the window asks me "What did you order again?" and I tell her nicely (even though my teeth were all gritted and mean in my head) and she looks at me and says "M'aam, the car in front of you just paid for your food and said to tell you to have a Nice Day".

Wow. Just Wow. I am speechless and Wow. This means I have to do this for someone too, return the gesture, you know, Pay it Forward so to speak. I'll do it and I'll do it tomorrow, if I remember and if I'm not running late and so aggravated I forget.

But really......isn't that just....Wow?!

Contest!

not here...

HERE!!

Visit Scary Mommy and enter to win the very adorable Baby Einsteins bucket and if you don't have babies, win it and give it to a friend that does. Baby Einstein is fantastic and both of the minis have loved it!!

Smarty Britches!.....what did you call me?

rolling on....

Remember a month or so ago when the Husband was going grocery shopping and (gasp) putting loads of laundry in "for me" (because obviously I'm the only one in the house that eats and wears clean clothes right?). Well that lasted exactly one week and we are back to being King Lazy of Lethargic Island.



I hate to bore you with another post about how my husband is worthless and blah idiot blah blah stupid. Why do I stay married to him you ask? Good question. You'll be the first to know when I figure it out. He is easy on the eyes, but I'm not much of a sucker for that kind of thing so that's not enough to keep it interesting for me. I'm giving this issue some serious thought and I will let you know once the smoke clears from my brain bursting into flames.


Big One has a birthday coming up (remember how I was all "help me help me" about her birthday party?) and we have made an executive decision about how it will be handled. Big One wants a Wii for her birthday. This is quite an expensive gift for a 7 year old and more than we usually spend on the gift itself. Parties can get kind of pricey depending on the venue. So we made a deal with Big One, if we get you a Wii for your birthday, no party. You will still have a birthday gathering of the whole fandamily complete with cake and a couple small gifts to open, but no 'party' with all her friends and neighbors and all that. She was a little undecided at first...and then after her BFF's birthday party at the skating rink this past Friday night, she was all over our idea. It was drama on skates, six year old style....


Big One has been BFF's with this little girl, we'll call her McSassy since they were in diapers. They still see each other every day at the same Mini Storage they've always gone to, but since they go to different elementary schools they only see each other in the afterschool program. McSassy's skating party was the talk of the after school and everyone was excited. She invited everyone, including the dreaded other girl, we'll call her McBully. She is 6 going on 35 and good LAWD is that girl manipulative. She tries desperately to split up Big One and McSassy on the daily. She is so jealous of their BFF-ness that she's pits one against the other and usually someone ends up in tears. It's drama drama drama. Well at the skating party McBully was pulling out all the stops trying to be McSassy's favorite and Big One got her feelings demolished. It was devastation and pouting all up and down that rink. The icing on the cake so to speak was when McSassy let McBully have one of the Littlest Pet Shop cake decorations off the birthday cake to take home..........too far........

It took me an entire day to pull Big One up out of those dumps.....no pretty. Apparently McBully got all bully-ish after Big One left and McSassy was all "wait a minute this is MY party...back off Bully girl!" and of course when Big One heard that she and McSassy are back to being BFF's now and are all "we aren't going to play with McBully because she tries to make us be mean to each other" and McSassy tried to make it up to Big One by bringing her the other pet shop decoration to school......good move McSassy, Big One is on cloud nine and feeling avenged.

Oh the humanity.....

I can only imagine it gets worse the older they get. I say we start smuggling the booze into the mini-parties? inappropriate much?

Public Service Announcement

Hi bloggy friends! Just wanted you all to check and re-check anything you have in your house or desk drawer (stop looking at me like that), that is made with peanut butter!!!! I have 3 boxes/pkgs. that are going back to the store today!! I'll be back later with real post!!

Clif Bar & Co., of Berkeley, Calif., recalled Clif and Luna brand bars made with peanut butter, which are sold throughout the United States. Abbott Nutrition of Columbus, Ohio, recalled ZonePerfect Chocolate Peanut Butter bars, ZonePerfect Peanut Toffee bars and NutriPals Peanut Butter Chocolate nutrition bars. The products were sold in the United States, Mexico, New Zealand and Singapore. Kroger Co., of Cincinnati, recalled Private Selection Peanut Butter Passion Ice Cream, sold in some but not all of their stores. Safeway, of Westmont, Ill., recalled Ready Pack Eating Right Kids Apples with Peanut Butter and Orchard Valley Harvest's Organic Bark Peanut Butter Cookies and Cream, according to the Associated Press. Ralcorp Frozen Bakery Products Inc. of Downer's Grove, Ill., has recalled all Food Lion and Wal-Mart Bakery brands of peanut butter cookies, peanut butter no-bake cookies and peanut butter fudge no-bake cookies. It is also recalling its nationally distributed Lofthouse brand versions of those cookies as well as Parco Foods' Chuck's Chunky brand of peanut butter cookies and Pastries Plus gourmet cookies. Meijer Inc. of Grand Rapids, Mich., is pulling back two types of crackers and two varieties of ice cream sold in five states at its stores and at gas stations. The South Bend Chocolate Co., of South Bend, Ind., is recalling assorted chocolates, valentine hearts, peanut butter fudge and peanut butter chocolate fudge. General Mills of Minneapolis is recalling two flavors of snack bars: Larabar Peanut Butter Cookie snack bars and JamFrakas Peanut Butter Blisscrisp snack bars. McKee Foods Corp. of Collegedale, Tenn., has recalled Little Debbie Peanut Butter Toasty and Peanut Butter Cheese Sandwich Crackers. Hy-Vee Inc., of Des Moines, which distributes in several states in the Midwest, recalled various bakery products containing peanut butter. Food Lion, of Salisbury, N.C., with stores in the southeast and mid-Atlantic states, has removed Bake Shop peanut butter cookies from its shelves. Perry's Ice Cream, of Buffalo, N.Y., announced a voluntary recall of select ice cream products containing peanut butter sauce, which were distributed in five states. Meanwhile, Kellogg of Battle Creek, Mich., said Monday that tests confirmed salmonella bacteria in a single package of one of its recalled peanut butter crackers.

***see the whole list of recalls and the announcement/information HERE at the US Food & Drug Administration's page regarding the Salmonella outbreak!!

Snow Break!

We woke up to this..........

and then we played on this

and then we did some of this.....

and then some of this.....

and a little of this.....

and then we came inside to warm up with Mommy's robe and a little kitty heater

say it with me now.....AWWWWW!

Friday Fragments

I haven't done Friday Fragments in a while...not that any one's missed it but I'm feeling all fragmenty today so watch out and let the shit slingin' begin!

* I hardly ever get sick, I can't say why that is because it's not like I take super great care of myself and it's not like I don't drink and (gasp) smoke (sometimes.....not all the time...calm down). Nonetheless, I am now sick. I have a sinus infection that would kill a grown man (but wouldn't any form of illness kill a MAN?) and I'm pretty sure my sinus cavities are pushing maximum density. Fun times.

* Big One's BFF is having a birthday party at local skating rink tonight. BLECH! I can't skate anymore because I don't dare fuck up my last knee surgery. If I can't make that transplant last I'm looking at total knee replacement. BLECH BLECH! So looks like I'm stuck watching all the fun from the sidelines tonight with Little One. (hmmm....wonder if there is wine at the skating rink? or beer at the least!)

* Must be a full moon or something cause the Husband is Mr. Negativity. King of Negativeland. Prince Negatory. I'm over it. Why do men turn crazy when there is a full moon? Is it just mine or do you find that to be true as well? I hate Negative Husband. I despise him. Everyone is out to get him you see and doomsday is surely on the horizon.

* Little One is trying to walk. I'm not ready for that. Oh, don't get me wrong, I don't dread the 'growing up to fast' part, hell I can't wait to get my left hip back. I just haven't found the right kind of baby gate for our obnoxious staircase yet.

* Since we (and by we I mean me) were all on the topic of tv shows the other day I started wondering when one of my favorites was coming back on and then panicked thinking maybe it got cancelled! But it didn't....maybe you've seen it too? Rules of Engagement. Too funny....still no date of return just 'coming soon'

* Why is First Grade math confusing to me? I am a well educated, math minded individual. I am an accounting major for the love of all that's holy....so I ask you what the H.E.L.L. is a Take Away Story and why can't you just teach ADDITION and SUBTRACTION like it was meant to be? At this rate I won't be able to help her with her homework by second grade.

* My husband is a total and complete idiot (just thought I'd throw that one in there)

* I joined Twitter this week and I gotta say....it's fun I guess, maybe it just takes time to work up to it. I feel like I'm in high school again trying to keep up with the cool kids.

* Do you ever get the feeling you're being watched? I do. All the time. We already know I'm a little off center but really.....I seriously do have a neighbor behind me that I always have this strange sensation is watching us/me. It's very disconcerting and creeps me out in a major way.

* I was looking at jeans for the Husband in my favorite shopping destination, you know, Target. If yours Target is like mine, back in the Mens Department they have a wall of 'witty' tshirts in the back. I was aimlessly wandering around looking at jeans and there were these two guys in the back at the wall 'o' shirts guffawing and reading out loud or really screaming out loud the witty shirt sayings to each other. I wanted to walk up and slap both of them as hard as I could and yell "snap out of it!"...don't they know those shirts are so like 2007? And half of them aren't even funny, they're just stupid.....or do I just have a bad attitude?

That's all I got today folks.....and I don't even have my normal witty tagline....sorry to disappoint but for more Friday Fragments, see the awesome Mrs. 444!!!

and another thing....

I might be officially barred from the blogosphere for this but here goes......

I hate American Idol......not just dislike it, I hate it. I can't stand it. It makes me crazy. I watched the first season of it and then I was done. Been there done that. The season lasts forever, no one is ever happy with the outcome and way too many of my blogs and shows and radio hosts devote way too much time to it. By mid-season I'm ready to pluck out my eyeballs with a fork. I can't get into it. The ONLY part of the show that might be slightly interesting are the funny auditions, but even that gets old after 59,000 episodes leading up to the real deal. I'm sorry American Idol, she's just not that into you..

and another thing....I know that a lot of you are all 'OMG the Bachelor is back!!'.....and normally I would have been the same way but I'm done. D.O.N.E. done with it. It's all a crock of shit. They force them to keep the crazies for ratings. They never pick who you want or think they should in the end and they almost always (99.999% of the time) break up within 3 months of wrapping up the show. What's the point? It's crap. Crap crap crap crap crap. It doesn't interest me anymore.....same shit different cast.

and Survivor.....seriously.....there are actually people that still watch that show? I can't really claim an opinion here because I hated it from the get go.

now give me some BRAVO......give me some Real Housewives of Wherever.....those shows all rock the house. That is a trainwreck waiting to happen in each and every delicious episode. All those bitches have issues and I love them. I cannot get enough of them. I love BRAVO. It is an awesome channel. I also love A&E. I love me some Intervention. If I can look into lives that suck worse than mine and see those people come out on the other side, there's hope for my little life yet. I love 48 Hours Mystery too and I like that new Homeland Security show too. I was so sad when Rob & Big didn't come back. I lurved Rob and Big.....they cracked me up I also like Cribs, when they get around to putting out new episodes, which is never. I used to love that Courtney Cox show Dirt on FX but I think it's been cancelled.

Didn't mean for it to go this far. My whole point was that I hate American Idol and The Bachelor is kind of over for me......go ahead and click the little X at the top of the screen.....I know, I know

Thousand Words Thursday

I'm going to assume my post was too long yesterday since no one wanted to play.....sorry, I still need answers though....(Big One's birthday...Hello??) So today I'm keeping it simple stupid (me stupid, not you stupid) and playing along with Jen at Cheaper than Therapy for Thousand Words Thursday!



I love this little beauty.......we INSISTED upon wearing this get-up complete with 'pretty ponies' to the grocery store that day and notice she has on her 'lips' as we call them.....we go NOWHERE without our 'lips'

Dilemmas

Dilemma #1

I step out of the Gas Hog and start to walk around to the passenger side to get Little One out when I am approached by a woman wearing a black heavy coat with the hood up and black sweat pants. "Excuse me, but could you come over here to my car and help me get my grandson out of his car seat? I can't seem to get the latch undone". What do I do?

I don't know this person. If I go over to her car which happens to be halfway across the parking lot to help her get her grandson out (which will require two hands), that means I have either leave Little One in my car alone while I go to her car or I have to get Little One out (32 degrees outside and raining) and let this stranger hold her while I get the grandson out. Again, I don't know this person from Adam. What if there is no grandson in the car? What if she is in cahoots with someone else and just wants to steal my car? What if she just wants to steal my purse? or worse what if she What if she thinks I'm going to come help her and knows she'll have to hold my baby and takes her? Or is trying to get me away from the car so they can take the car AND the baby?

OR

What if she's just a nice lady that can't get the latch undone on her grandson's car seat?

What did I do? Well you'll just have to wait for that.....What would YOU do?


Dilemma #2

Big One has a birthday coming up in a couple weeks, February 7th to be exact. She will be 7 years old. SEVEN.....WOW! Wasn't she just born last week? Didn't we just have her 3rd birthday party yesterday? So I'm talking with Big One about what she wants to do for her birthday this year. Last year she did Sweet & Sassy (my yahoo friends will remember my plight, MISSING my little girls birthday party while I was living in the hospital waiting for Little One to arrive, or not arrive just yet actually....worst time of my life. It still kills me that I missed such an important day for her. My own personal hell, living in the hospital AND missing an important time for her), the year before she did Monkey Joe's, the year before Build A Bear and so on and so forth. How sad is it that we are already running out of birthday places and she's only 7?? You see anything outdoors is out of the question because well, she was born the beginning of February and that happens to be the coldest month of the year here in North Carolina and the weather is ALWAYS shitty on her birthday. It hasn't failed yet. Well, if you've ever had a little girl or been a little girl you know that you can't, you just CAN'T have the same 'kind' of birthday party that your friend is having.....which means no skating, ice or roller this year and no spa (ha!) and no bowling, plus the fact the we are no longer "babies" and are way to sophisticated for babyish themes or princesses and such. It actually leaves us next to no ideas. I can't deal with a slumber party, I can't even get Little One to sleep through the night, she's always sick and truth be told I'm not sure my nerves can take that many 6 and 7 year old girls at one time....just being honest. So Big One is trying to decide and can't come up with anything. Help.

Help us, help me.....HELP!

Again I ask, what would you do?


Dilemma #3

We decided to finish the bonus room as a nursery when I found out I was pregnant in 2007. I knew exactly what I wanted, boy or girl and I had the perfect ideas in my head. It would be the perfect shade of light aqua blue with white crown molding, white dressers (3 of them) set into the wall to create more floor space and a white tree with tan leaves hand painted by me into the corner and up onto the ceiling of one side of the room. Perfect. I even ordered the bedding cause it didn't matter boy or girl, that was the room. Over the next few months we got the insulation done and the framing and modifications finished. The electrical was nearly finished and the sheet rock was delivered and ready to be hung but we had to wait for the HVAC guys to come and move some duct work around....and then I lost the baby.......

By far the worst day of my life. I'm not sure I'll ever live to see a harder day than that. I hope and pray that I don't. BUT that's another post, this post is about my dilemma. On with the story.......about 4 months later I found out I was pregnant AGAIN. This time not on purpose and this time I WAS NOT happy about it. I couldn't force myself to get happy. It was awful. I never even told anyone I was pregnant until I was 5 months along. So this whole time I was in denial. Never even set foot in the 'nursery' that was still unfinished. Never gave it another thought. Did not begin to make plans or prepare for this baby, because I couldn't. I couldn't do it. I was so afraid of losing another baby that I couldn't do it. So long story short early in January last year I started bleeding.....yup.....I knew it right? I was right not to plan.....so I thought. I ended up on bedrest with a placenta previa. So now I'm not only not wanting to be pregnant or even admitting that this is happening, but the baby is due in April and I am expected to lay in a bed for the next 4 months....Oh dear God.....

As you can imagine this gave me a lot of time to think and I decided it was time to finish the nursery (well the Husband actually decided that he was going to do it regardless and if I wanted it to be done my way I'd better start admitting this WAS happening). SO, he had done all the work he could do without help and expertise so we decided to hire someone to do the rest. We hired a guy that works with me and does remodels on the side. I've known him for years and years and he's done lots of work for lots of people I know. He knew we were on a tight budget and now with me out of work it had to be done quickly and on a budget because we were paying him by the hour and didn't have a lot to spend on this project. Well, long story short the little bit of work that needed done by him (hang sheet rock, mud sheet rock, trim work and a few little things) should take no more than two weeks maximum. It took almost until the baby was born and he brought a helper to boot......ridiculous. I thought surely he didn't expect I'd be paying for both when it was a one man job and very small at that!! He did, he billed me for so many hours and for two people at that. I was out of work and was earning about $175/week on disability. Well, after I got that bill, literally the next day I started bleeding again and this time they admitted me and wouldn't let me leave until the baby was born (she was born a month later at 36 weeks due to a big bleed emergency csection.....she was due end of April and was born March 1st at 4lbs. 13 oz. 17 1/2 in). ANYWAY (focus Said So, focus!) this asshat was bugging the shit out of me the whole time wanting his money. I told him that we were going to have to talk about this, he drug it out on purpose to make more money and I didn't think what he was asking was fair for the small amount of work that was done. Plus I've known this person and it baffled me that he would do this to me.....

We ended up getting two other contractors to give us quotes on what it SHOULD have cost (which was less than HALF of what he was charging me) thinking that we would show him those and asking WTF? maybe negotiate a little seeing how we had NO extra money and a new baby in the NICU.....plus keep in mind this person was a 'friend'. All this was going to make it quite uncomfortable for me to back to work since I saw him every day there. The deadline on doing something.....pay him or confront him was coming up.....

What would YOU have done? What did I do? You'll have to wait and see......

Dilemma #4

Last one.....pinky swear

I'm thinking of starting a new Wednesday thing......Would You Rather Wednesday.......

See Big One got this awesome game for Christmas called (appropriately) Would You Rather? and we have had the most fun with it! Makes me want to to play it with all the blogworld!

Example......Would you rather be able to bring about world peace or cure all hunger and disease? or Would you rather be able to fly or read people's minds? or Would you rather age only from the neck up or age only from the neck down?

Anyway, it's in the planning stage and I want to know what you think....

Public Service Announcement

We interrupt this program to inform you that today is officially

Delurking Day!

Today is the day to finally quit being a voyeur and participate!! Leave a comment. Your comment doesn't have to be nice, doesn't have to be mean either. You can say anything you want. You can say Hey! or Kiss my ass! or you ARE an idiot! or suck it! or don't suck it! or whatever! Just LEAVE comments today. Come out of the comment closet and let it out! Tell us something, anything....us bloggers are comment whores and we LOVE it!

and while you are practicing being all commenty and stuff...visit my friends on my blogroll over there to the right and leave them comment love as well!

And while we are at it, I'm updating my blogroll and if you aren't on it and want to be, here is your opportunity to leave a comment and be de-lurked! Leave me a comment with your blogname and address and I'll add you to my blogroll ASAP....

Thank You, regular programming will resume when I get around to posting again shortly

Old Fart

I know I'm not alone in this. In fact I'm sure I've seen other blogmommies that feel the same way. I don't know what that damn Twilight series (I'm almost done with Eclipse.....but have already gone to her website and ruined the next book for myself, but I'm still going to read listen to the last book, and it better be good cause I'm gonna be pissed if it's all draggy and teen angst-like Eclipse has been) has done to me....THAT was one hellava run on sentence no? I probably get on the nerves of the readers reader that follows all of the punctuation and grammar rules....sorry about that. I can either type what's on my mind in the short time span I have allotted or I can make sure all the grammar and punctuation are correct.....I simply don't care don't have time for both.

FOCUS

Okay, sorry I got distracted, big surprise there. Anyway I find it disturbing, almost like I'm doing something I'm not supposed to since this whole series was aimed at the teenage demographic, but I cannot get enough of Edward. I love Edward. I want to marry Edward. I might even consider having more children for Edward.....and we all know how I feel about THAT! I'm almost sad that I'm nearing the last book, the end of the story....the end of listening to Edward every day. I literally cannot wait to get in my car so I can listen to more. Eclipse was getting kind of draggy and during the 'indian legends around the fire' part I think my ears started bleeding from boredom. I wanted to fast forward through all that boringness and Jacob was starting to tap dance on my last nerve but I was afraid if I fast forwarded I would miss something, even one little sentence from Edward. UGHH! It's out of control. I can't wait to listen to book 4. Whoever cast Robert Pattinson as Edward deserves some sort of Academy Award, Golden Globe, Moon Man, People's Choice, Emmy, Oscar....cause he is PERFECT. I don't normally find myself lusting after imaginary characters and the actors that play them but Edward is mesmerizing......it's a sickness.

Please tell me book 4 is worth the wait, it's worth the read listen....cause I'm gonna be all mad and "I hate Twilight" if it's not....

I heart Edward (and Robert Pattinson)....does that make me a (shudder) "cougar"? Oh please say no.....I hate that term and I am so NOT a "cougar"......I mean I am almost 37.....old fart is more like it!

Intervention

I read your Friday Fragments and I gotta say, I'm a little worried about you. You know who you are.

First of all I'm fearful for Barbie's safety. You seem a little on edge with her reinvented image....but what is most troubling to me is this whole "I want to be pregnant again" business.

WHAT are you thinking? SNAP out of it. Do I need to come there with a wet washcloth and slap you myself? Are four not enough to drive you right off the edge of that cliff? Have you no recollection of the sleepless nights and formula and diapers and good lord woman, what are you thinking? I am counting down the days to not having to buy formula and diapers ever again....and never mind that, what about being pregnant PERIOD....just thinking about being pregnant again makes me want to run out into oncoming traffic.

You are delusional. It's okay, it will pass, just watch a few SuperNanny episodes and maybe some of that Baby Story crap with the really horrible birthing stories or better yet, go volunteer in the 6-12 month room at a local daycare (especially this time of year when they are all sick and snotty and angry little monsters). Just come to my house and I'll let you have borrow Little One for as long as you want!! That should cure this 'wanting another baby' crap. I'm telling you, I'm a little more than worried, you mentioned it more than once in that post. I fear I may be too late.....

***SLAP***

snap out of it........you're scaring me!

Go smoke some pot and vacuum something......

My Mini Me?

I'm not sure why I'm in the middle, this wasn't my birthday party~
An old friend on FaceCrack posted this photo yesterday of me and two little friends at her 5th birthday party. I was 7 at the time, or almost 7. Same age as Big One. I was stunned when I saw the photo. I didn't realize how much Big One looked like me as a kid. These probably aren't the best comparison photos, but all I have on this computer......tell me what YOU think....

StupidMom

I saw something this morning when I dropped of Little One at Mini Storage that drives me absolutely insane. StupidMom gets out of her BMW in her cashmere knee length coat complete with scarf and gloves, adorable boots, very chic, very wintery. I loved her whole ensemble, it was completely to die for. She saunters around her BMW to the other side and opens the door to get out her minis. Mini#1 was in SHORTS and a t-shirt and flip flops. He was wearing a hoodie, he's probably 2. Mini#2 is probably one-ish, almost one and had on a short sleeve pajama top (I know it was pajamas because Little One had the same set back in the summer) with blue jeans and NO SHOES AND SOCKS....NO COAT....NOTHING. It is NOT warm today. It is rainy and cold and nasty and if she had the time to gussy herself up in her fancy shmancy coat and scarf ensemble with every hair in place and makeup perfect, outfit fantastic and WARM, why couldn't she dress the kids? I don't care if they aren't wearing designer cashmere coats and gloves but DAMN, can't they have a coat at all? Can't they at least have socks? What is wrong with people?



Little One doesn't nap when she's in Storage. Little One takes approximately two 15 minute naps per day. She spends the rest of her time terrorizing the other babies that are trying to nap and driving the teachers batty with her incessant demands and getting into everything. I feel bad. I have THAT kid. My kid is the one that irritates the shit out of all the other kids and probably makes the teachers wish they had another job....ANY other job. She's got a massive case of separation anxiety right now and teeth coming in to boot. Her little (or BIG) personality is coming into it's own right now and she is going to be a handful for sure. She's very mouthy and she's a little devilish. She's quick to tell you no no and even quicker to pitch a fit if she isn't being tended to her liking. I am not a helicopter mom. I do not hover, I do not give in to tantrums, I do not put up with whining and fit throwing...period. This mini is going to give me a run for my money. This mini might be the one that finally drives the nail in......



Big One tells me this morning that she hates school and wishes we could all stay home every day. No school, no work. I guess she doesn't quite get the whole-don't pay your bills, don't live in your house and enjoy electricity and running water-thing. She said she's never growing up and getting a job. Ever. She wants to live with Mommy and Daddy and Sissy and Bella forever. She thinks we will all just live happily ever after in our house, just the four of us and Bella. I hate to burst that cute little bubble and I hate even more thinking that in another couple years she's gonna hate me and the Husband and Sissy and we will be the most moronic people on earth and she will tell us life isn't fair and she hates us and she wishes she were never born and didn't have to live with us. I really hate to think of those years. I really hate to burst that sweet little picture she has in her mind right now, all lovey dovey and happily ever after....


I wrote a post (read it here) some months back about how the amount of medicine in the bottle never lasts the amount of days it is supposed to whenever we get antibiotics for either mini. Well, it happened again and I'm starting to think that I really can't do this right......is it me? Really? Does this never happen to anyone else? I mean, I am a well educated, smart person. I can read. I can read well. I can multitask like no one else. I hold down two jobs, single parent during the week, do most all of the laundry, dishes, housework, childrearing, etc. I run two businesses flawlessly. Why can I not make a bottle of antibiotics last 10 days? WHAT is the problem here? Maybe my name should be StupidMom.....nah, I do at least put socks and shoes on the minis

Tantrum

Why waste a tantrum when no one can see you?

FaceCrack Chronicles Part 3? or 4?

okay, this is weird.....or maybe it's a hint?

So I'm chatting on FaceCrack with a girl that I was very good friends with in high school, always had so much fun with, one of those people that when you are with them you KNOW it's gonna be a good time guaranteed. She always walked to the beat of a different drummer, but that's one of the things I loved about her most. She was also one of those people that was constantly "I hate Hometown"....."HATE this place"....."can't wait to get the hell out of Hometown, I'll never come back if I ever get out". Well, she wasn't kidding. She actually went to college just about 20 miles down the road, but literally disappeared into thin air after graduation. Never called anyone, never came around, didn't keep in touch, nothing. She went out of her way to melt away and get out of Hometown forever. I think I saw her one time at a party after graduation and that's the last I had heard from her.....and dating myself, I graduated in 1990.....until about two weeks ago.

I get up one morning while on hiatus from work over the holidays (HA! it's more work to be at home!) and open my email and there is a notification from FaceCrack that "Emily NewLastName" added you as a friend. The photo on the profile gives no indication as to who Emily NewLastName is so I'm thinking, who the hell is this person, she must think I'm someone else. So I ignored it for a few days. Then one night I was drinking wine (wouldn't you know it....big surprise) and was on FaceCrack chatting with my BFF (why we weren't just on the phone who knows, but we were drinking and drunk typing...give me a break) and I decided to just say F-it.....I'll be-friend Emily NewLastName and let her know at least that she's got the wrong gal, I can always delete her later right? Well, you guessed it, Emily NewLastName is really Old Girlfriend. She purposely didn't put her maiden name on her profile so as not to be contacted by the entire graduating class and every single person she's ever met in her life (smart one that she is....I am not so smart!) So I had NO CLUE it was her and she never entered my mind.

Anyway, we have been catching up and chatting a lot on FaceCrack and even talked on the phone a few times. We arranged to meet up for lunch and drinks while I was on hiatus and could drop the minis off at Storage for the day. So I'm all excited can't wait to see my old friend, we make plans and all. Well, the night before we hadn't set a time or anything so I decided to first send her a message on FaceCrack.....so I did, no response. Then I sent her a text message......no response.......called and left a voicemail......no response........this was almost a week ago and I still haven't heard from her. She disappeared into thin air......again

Update on FaceCrack Chronicles Part 2, the one about the ex best friend.......haven't seen or heard from her in what will be 2 years in February. The Husband and I dropped the minis at Storage Friday and went out to breakfast and to do a few things together. He needed a haircut and had an appointment so I was just going to ride with him instead of going all the way home first. On the way his brother called and needed to borrow something that was at our house so the Husband decided to swing home real quick. I'm sitting in our driveway in the truck and something, I don't know what, but something told me not to go, something said, get out and go in the house and enjoy a moment of time alone. So at the last second I decided to stay home.....well guess who was sitting in the stylists chair when the Husband walked in to get his haircut? Yep, the exbestfriend.......AWKWARD.......can you just imagine if I had gone????? Oh dear lord that would not have been good. Oh MY!! And yes, he spoke to her and she asked all about me and the minis, he was careful to respect me and not give her too much information. I hope this doesn't give her license to try to contact me????

Happy New Year?

We've had Bella for ONE stinkin week and the little shit has already earned herself a trip to the emergency vet clinic yesterday. Not how I wanted to spend my Sunday. Not how I wanted to spend my Christmas money...but it was either that or take out a second mortgage....(have you ever had to go to an emergency vet? only ones open on Sunday where I live...)

I let Bella out of her 'room' aka my office Sunday morning. She's been confined there at night, we've only been letting her roam the house supervised until we were sure she had the litter box and such down pat. She does, but we are trying to get her used to things without overwhelming her and ending up with accidents upstairs or something. WELL, long story short she took off like her tail was on fire out of the room to go explore and ran like a bat out of hell upstairs to snoop. We have hardwood floors throughout the house including the stairs and the huge landing at the top of the stairs. The pickets in the staircase are wrought iron twisted thingies. She was at the top of the landing (about 12 feet up or so) and was playing furiously with something she found. Neither the Husband or I were paying much attention to her as there were minis to attend to that were demanding to be fed and such and all of sudden we heard this terrible crash. It was a BIG crash. I thought he dropped the baby or something and he thought the same thing. Apparently Bella couldn't get traction on the hardwoods upstairs and flew through the pickets at the top flying 12 feet to a thunderous crash onto the hardwoods in the living room below. She landed somewhere near the bar on the other side of the kitchen......and let out a cry. OMG....at first I thought she was okay, cause neither of us actually saw her fall. Then an hour or so later I noticed she was not putting pressure on her leg and couldn't walk. Shitfuckdamn.....here we go to the vet. Of course I wanted her to be okay, but all I could see were the dollar signs.....and lord knows we don't need to be throwing money at a vet right now....

245 dollars and 3 hours later, Big One and Bella and I walk out of the Emergency Vet. She did not break her leg and had no internal injuries THANK GOD. But she sprained her knee and is on pain meds for 3 days. The good news, she's already using it more and acting better. The bad news, I am 245 dollars poorer and had 3 hours of my very precious Sunday stolen by a little stinker that will now be confined to my office aka 'her room' until I get the baby gates up. Oh well, I've gotta put them up for Little One anyway. She's cruising furniture and almost walking now anyway.

Onto more fun things.......before I forget..Happy New Year!!! Hope yours was more eventful than mine. Minis in bed at 7:00 and 9:00 and then I was asleep by 10:00......oh yes I was. The Husband went to the annual neighborhood bash...interesting. Always fun but no sitter this year. Bummer for me but no hangover the next day either. Then a friend of mine's brother got married to his long time girlfriend. We never thought they'd do it. They are very young still but have a 6 year old son together. She had Eli at age 15, so she's just now 21 herself. The wedding was.....interesting. Without revealing too much......this was her dress...notice the 'top hat' with black veil. She wore black Doc Martens under her dress......bridesmaids wore blood red dresses with black crosses and flower girl and ring bearer wore white with black lace and red roses.....someone's been reading too much 'Twilight'.....